


A Hairy Situation

by Mythdefied



Category: Hercules: The Legendary Journeys, Xena: Warrior Princess
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-20
Updated: 2013-01-20
Packaged: 2017-11-26 04:05:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/646359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mythdefied/pseuds/Mythdefied
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aphrodite’s enraged voice announced her presence a bare second before she appeared in the middle of Ares’ temple.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Hairy Situation

“One of you fashion rejects is so gonna _pay_!” Aphrodite’s enraged voice announced her presence a bare second before she appeared in the middle of Ares’ temple, the usual pink and gold sparkles flashing about her in a way that somehow managed to appear threatening.

Deimos shrieked and vanished with a _pop_ that was barely audible over the thunder that suddenly rolled through the temple, a perfect accompaniment to the furious expression on Aphrodite’s face - a face surrounded by a mass of bright orange hair.

Ares, slouched in his throne, just raised an eyebrow, a grin slowly raising the corners of his mouth.

Strife oozed his way behind the nearest support column -- and found himself sharing space with Discord.

“I was here first; find your own,” she ordered, giving his shoulder a shove.

Smirking, Strife just slid closer, his shoulder to her chest. She started to recoil, disgust plain in her expression, but Strife’s whispered words froze her in her tracks: “I told you Aphrodite was a bottle blond.”

“What-- _you_ did _that_?” Discord said in disbelief, quickly glancing around the column before ducking back behind it just as quickly.

“Yep.” Strife’s smirk widened. “Just a little,” he snapped the fingers of both hands, dark blue sparkles scattering from them, “and her hair dye she _swears_ she doesn’t use goes screwy.” 

“You so much as _think_ about laughing, Ar, and you’ll end up in lust with the nearest goat!” Aphrodite shouted.

“Hey, whatever you say, sis,” Ares said, amusement thick in his voice. “I can see you’re feeling a little...off color today.”

A wordless sound of fury and a flash of light so bright that Strife winced and instinctively ducked -- an instinct Discord apparently shared since they ended up knocking their heads together and nearly staggering out from behind the protection of the column.

“You utter klutz!” Discord snarled at him, rubbing her forehead.

“Yeah, and you’re Miss Coordination over there.” Strife rolled his eyes, rubbing his own head.

Discord opened her mouth, to say what, Strife never knew, because at that moment a goat trotted past the column -- a goat wearing black leather and a silver earring in one ear.

“Ares?” Discord whispered. Strife just stared.

“Yaaa,” the goat bleated, then trotted away.

Shaking her head, Discord looked at Strife again. “You know, when Aphrodite figures out you did this -- when _Ares_ finds out -- you’re going to be in the kind of trouble you can’t even begin to imagine, Strife.” She smirked. “I can’t wait to see what they do to you.”

“To me?” Strife gave her his best wide-eyed innocent look. “But, what did _I_ do, Discord?” A quick zap of power, too fast for her to dodge, and abruptly Discord’s hands were stained the same loud hue as Aphrodite’s hair.

“Look at you, caught orange-handed,” Strife said with a wicked grin, then shoved her hard.

Discord shrieked in anger as she staggered out from behind the column.

“ _You_! Oh, I just _knew_ it was you, you skank!”

Discord wrenched her furious gaze from Strife, eyes widening a moment before a pink ball of light slammed into her, knocking her off her feet. When she stood up again a moment later, her black leathers had been transformed into pink chiffon with delicate lace trim. 

Strife had to clamp both hands over his mouth to keep from laughing out loud.

“You were always jealous that I’m so better looking!” Aphrodite yelled, and another ball of fluffy pink light came flying from her direction.

“Oh, as _if_!” Discord leveled a narrow-eyed glare at her. With a wordless noise of fury, she ran past the column, cherry red pools of energy forming in her stained palms.

A moment later there were screams of hatred and insults and more flashes of multicolored light; thunder began crashing throughout the temple, shaking it to its foundations, sending bits of stone and mortar dusting down to the floor.

As the column behind him began spiderwebbing with cracks, Strife finally let out the laughter, bright and high-pitched, drowned out amidst the cacophony around him. Fates above, how he loved his job!

 

Fin


End file.
